odd

3 weeks ago
I met Jess at an auction

she looked radiant
and I finally saw the baby
what was to be my godchild
had she been baptized.
She will be.

Now I can't help but think
that I met her that day for a reason

one last time

I am so distraught over this.

I've lost people in my life,
but Jess is different

Jess is a part of my youth
and she bridges the gaps
Jess is the girl who sat next to me in Kindergarten

Jess is the girl who I would always cheat with
in Mr. Young's class

Jess is the girl who always made me laugh
in Seminar

Jess was my shopping partner

and now Jess is gone.

I found my picture of us
at the prom
I loved her hair
she was beautiful

closed casket I'm sure.
stifled beauty

I want to remember Jess the way I saw her 3 weeks ago
happy, smiling, with Lilly on her hip, bidding on a box of Tupperware
and graciously accepting the microwave I won for her new house.

I love you Jess.
always.